As I’m sure many of you know, Spiderman 3 opened over the weekend. Holly was pretty much working all weekend so I didn’t get to go see it… yet. We’re going this afternoon. I can hardly wait. The anticipation got me to thinking about something that I often contemplate: what would be the best superpower to have?
If you look at comic book lore, there’s a vast array of powers to choose from. Superman pretty much has it all: super strength, cool vision powers, the ability to fly, super hearing, you name it. Green Lantern has his power ring. Spiderman is well, a spider man. Wolverine has a super bad attitude, claws that shoot through his fists, and the ability to heal himself. Batman is just a normal guy with cool toys but he’s hardcore and I wouldn’t mess with him.
Stepping outside of the comic universes, there is the new television sensation Heroes which is basically like X-Men only without the spandex. There are some cool powers there like the guy who absorbs other people’s powers, the bad guy who opens people’s heads to learn how to use their powers by examining their brains, the kid who can make ATMs give him money, and the chick that has the really scary multiple personality disorder. (What’s up with that? Question: Since when is a disease a super power? Answer: I guess when your other personality is a hardcore killer that’s really strong.) I could go on and on but I need to get to a point here.
The Flash can run so fast that he has been able to travel through time. Running fast is ok. It’s more than ok if you’re in the Olympics. Even though it’s not his primary power, travelling through time is very cool but if you have to run to get there, is it really worth it? The answer is yes. The best hero however is Hiro from Heroes. Why is he the best? Because he can bend the space time continuum without having to run to do so. Plus he’s a computer nerd so that gives him bonus points.
I used to think that the power to become invisible would be the best super power but I have changed my mind. Time travel is the best. When I mention this to my geek friends, they always ask me what I would do if I could travel through time. That’s the wrong question. The question that they should be asking is what wouldn’t I do? The possibilities are endless. How cool would it be for people to reference my name instead of Warren Buffet’s when talking about the stock market? If I could travel through time, I’d have known to buy Hansen Natural stock which has gone up 24,185% since 1996. Who else would have guessed that? And let’s not forget all the money to be made from betting on sporting events. Back to the Future II anyone?
Then there’s all of the screw ups that could be avoided. How many times have you put yourself in an embarssing suituation and wished that you could turn back time? If I had the power to do so, I’d never feel that way. (The following is a generic situation. I have never had this happen to me.) “Does this dress make me look fat?” “No. Your face does.” “Why I oughta…” *Blink and go back in time five minutes.* “Does this dress make me look fat?” “Nope. You’re hot.” See how beneficial that would be?
It’s said that those who don’t learn from history are doomed to repeat it. But what if I had the ability to change history? That would just be awesome…
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